Thursday, September 21, 2006

Dear Shelli,

I am so sorry that you are having to experience this trauma. Sometimes the Lord sends things to us in the order we can handle the news. Yes, it is definitely frustrating that the doctors were not all on the same page but maybe the news would have been so devastating that you could not have done all the chemo, etc. as you did. I understand the trauma of losing a breast (even if I was married) it was horrible. I am so visual, just knowing I would be deformed was humiliating. I just had to look at the bigger picture. A breast after all is not an essential part of my functioning on a daily basis. To loose and eye, arm, leg, etc would have been tragic. A breast or two of them in my case was disappointing. You have a son to raise and to leave anything that could metastasize would be very risky. I had the same condition and what they told me was not that I might risk further cancer, but that the only question was when the cancer would reoccur. A breast was not worth that. I did not have to do chemo, because they didn't do it back then if the tumor was contained. In hindsight, I beat the percentages. It has been over twenty years for me and I have been at peace with the decision. The one thing I liked was that the plastic surgeon did the reconstruction at the same time. I did not have to do a separate surgery. I ache for your decision, and I am sorry it is so painful for you. What is the Lord wanting you to learn from this? Surely our challenges are custom designed. Acceptance of what our challenges are in life brings peace. It's that "kicking against the pricks!" that brings so much pain. Sometimes we do things because it's the right thing to do not what we want to do. By all means get second oppinions -- but by all means -- be wise.

My prayers are with you and I love you. (Aunt) G.